LOOK INTO MY EYES

NETTIE-OLOGY: Look me in the eyes!  

The ability to properly communicate is an endangered behavior. In recent times I began receiving an increasing number of text messages that warranted telephone calls and, though not as many, telephone calls that should have been face to face conversation.

Think about this, when communicating via text message or social media, CAPITAL LETTERS IS YELLING. Not everyone who text knows that some people just use all caps because they are not typist and do not like looking for the cap key for one letter. I have also had communications via text message that were so long it required my receiving multiple text to complete the one transmission.

Very few people want eye to eye contact with others. I often joke “my eyes don’t lie” but it is very true, if you look in my eyes the perceptive person can see how I really feel. Liars control how they look but the rest of their body reveal the truth. Eye contact is dangerous to the liar but it is good for the individual who wants to share a truth with all sincerity.

The art of communicating is the ability to diffuse a situation with words. I have to commit to listening to you, paying attention to your feelings and respond with honesty and empathy. You may not like what is said but if spoken correctly you will be able to deal with it. Text messages, social media post / messages are forms of communicating but can easily taken out of context; telephone calls can end abruptly. Let’s bring back talking face to face, eye to eye over a cup of tea.                     written by MARSHA L F Randolph

 
NETTIE-OLOGY /NETTIE-ISM reflects the opinions of and is the soul property of the author MARSHA L F RANDOLPH. All rights reserved- do not use without permission. Disagreeing with what is written is not offensive to the author a disagreeable comment will be deleted.

NETTIE-OLOGY: THE HEART OF NETTIE

NETTIE-OLOGY: : THE HEART OF NETTIE- I WRITE

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I have allowed people to dictate my time and influence my thinking that ends today. I am not the entertainment committee- don’t just drop by. My kitchen is not self-serve; when you do stop by uninvited don’t expect me to offer you anything. If I want your opinion I will ask for it; I have not in all these years so…!

Yes, I make candles and soap; I crochet, knit and sew; I also garden. I do things that I enjoy that help me relax enough to forget about the cares of this world and focus on what I am writing; ironically I write about the cares of this world. Many times I force myself to interact with others rarely do I want to be with people.

I have to physically see and talk to loved ones to make sure they are OK and then I am ready to retreat. I don’t like unpaid bills because then I have to worry about if something is going to be turned off or canceled. I have no problem with me spontaneously doing a fun activity but I do have problems with other people want me to participate in their activities; people always want me to do things when I want to do nothing.

Am I selfish? Many people would say no but I am self-centered to the extent that I become really irritated when things are out of sort. I have to pray, prayer is part of the process. I am self-centered enough that if I don’t spend time alone with YHWH I am unbearable.

In 2018 my faith journey took a turn, I went deeper into the word of GOD. Because I was in unknown territory, receiving information that I had not heard before I trusted others to tell me what I was reading. The good news is, there was conflict in the information I was receiving and so I had to pray and do my own research. It is not that I disagreed with the people talking to me I just did not accept their truths; apparently I was right on January 1, 2018, I just have better understanding now.

In 2018 my relationships with my family was challenged;. I slowed down my activities to check myself. I gave away things I made that I could have sold to people who did not appreciate my efforts. I supported the decisions of people who were struggling and had made the decision to change only to later see them repeating what they had done to become discouraged. I canceled my plans to do what someone else wanted to do. By December of 2018 I realized: It wasn’t me; I was not the problem.

In 2018 I screwed up technically when it comes to my writing. Just before I published BEFORE YOU PRAY FOR ME I realized there were some format mistakes but I don’t have a copy of it, the only copy I have is at the copyright office. As I was editing FAMILY LEGACY my computer went down fortunately it was fixed and I continued writing. I started another manuscript TITUS WOMAN then my computer went down again with both manuscripts not saved and not completed. Nothing is on a flash or external hard-drive because I don’t have one. I am tired of starting over because I did not back up on an external hard-drive my writings THIS LESSON WAS LEARNED THE HARD WAY.

In 2018 I was my own worst supporter. I fully understand that I have very little support from friends and family, Vicki, my sister-friend, is the only one who not only encourages my writing but will redirect my attention when towards writing when I stop. In 2019 BEFORE YOU PRAY FOR ME will get published; the two manuscripts I am working on will get published. I learned a lot in 2018 but now it is time to stop sacrificing my gift from GOD to accommodate people who don’t understand what it means to be a writer.

written by Marsha L F Randolph
NETTIE-OLOGY /NETTIE-ISM reflects the opinions of and is the soul property of the author MARSHA L F RANDOLPH. All rights reserved- do not use without permission. Disagreeing with what is written is not offensive to the author a disagreeable comment will be deleted.